简单易懂好笑的英语笑话
学习啦在线学习网简单易懂好笑的英语笑话
《万荣72争笑话》是一部方言性质极强,幽默意味十足的笑话集，下面小编整理了简单易懂的英语笑话，希望大家喜欢!
简单易懂的英语笑话摘抄
实质性的纠正
学习啦在线学习网 Teacher: Walter, why don't you wash your face? I can see what you had for breakfast thismorning.
学习啦在线学习网 Walter: What was it?
学习啦在线学习网 Teacher: Eggs.
学习啦在线学习网 Walter: Wrong. That was yesterday.
老 师：沃尔特，你为什么不洗脸?我看得出你今天早饭吃了什么。
沃尔特：我吃了什么?
老 师：鸡蛋。
学习啦在线学习网 沃尔特：错了，老师。那是昨天吃的。
简单易懂的英语笑话鉴赏
当场擒获小偷
学习啦在线学习网 A shoplifter was caught red-handed trying to steal a watch from a jewelry store. "Listen,"said the shoplifter, "I know you don't want any trouble either. What do you say I just buy thewatch, and we forget about this?"
学习啦在线学习网 The manager agreed and wrote up the sales slip. The crook looked at the slip and said, "This isa little more than I intended to spend.Can you show me something less expensive?"
一个小偷在一家珠宝店企图偷走一只手表的时候被当场擒获。“听着，”小偷说，“我知道你们也不想惹麻烦。我把这只表买下，然后我们就当什么也没发生，你看怎样?”
经理表示同意，然后列了一张售货单。小偷看着单子说道：“这比我最初的预算稍稍高了一点。你们还有没有便宜一点儿东西。"
简单易懂的英语笑话赏析
一块还是两块?
Customer: Waiter, I've only got one piece of meat in my dish.
Waiter:Just a moment, sir and I'll cut it in two.
顾客：服务员，我盘子里怎么只有一块肉?
学习啦在线学习网 服务员：先生，请稍候，我去把它切成两块。
简单易懂的英语笑话欣赏
打猎秘籍
Two Russian hunters meet. "I shot a gigantic bear yesterday," says Ivan. "Look at the hide!"
学习啦在线学习网 "How do you find such huge bears?" Sergei asks.
"Easy," says Ivan. "You stand in front of a cave and whistle. When the bear comes out,you shoot."
Weeks later the two meet again. Sergei is covered in bandages. "Didn't you follow myadvice?" Ivan asks.
"Sure I did. I stood, in front of a cave and whistled, " Sergei replies.
"And what came out?"
"To me, "says Sergei, "it looked like the Trans-Siberian Express."
两个俄国猎人相遇。“我昨天打了一只巨熊，”伊凡说，“看看这兽皮!”
“你是如何发现这么大的熊的?”谢尔盖问道。
学习啦在线学习网 “很简单，”伊凡说，“你站在一个洞前并吹哨子。熊出来时你就开枪。”
学习啦在线学习网 几周后，两人见面了。谢尔盖浑身缠满了绷带。“难道你没有听我的建议?”伊凡问。
学习啦在线学习网 “我当然是按你的建议做的。我站在一个洞前并吹哨子，”谢尔盖回答说。
“出来了什么?”
“向着我来的，”谢尔盖说，“像是穿越西伯利亚的快车。”
简单易懂的英语笑话品味
学习啦在线学习网 一封特别的感谢信
nce I received a thank-you note from a friend whom I had helped. In the envelope were fivelottery tickets that had been scratched, revealing the numbers. "Thank you very much foryour help," the note read. "As a gift, I bought you some lottery tickets- sorry you didn't win. "
学习啦在线学习网 有一次，我收到一封感谢信，是一个我曾帮助过的朋友寄来的。信封内有五张彩票，都被刮过了，露出了数字。“非常感谢您的帮助，”信上写道，“作为礼物，我给您买了些彩票——真遗憾，您没中奖。”
简单易懂的英语笑话阅读
委婉的报丧方式
Two brothers, Herbert and James, lived with their mother and a cat named Edgar. James wasparticularly attached to the cat, and when he had to leave town for several days, he left Herbertmeticulous instructions about the pet' s care. At the end of this first day away. Jamestelephoned his brother. "How is Edgar?"
"Edgar is dead." Herbert answered. There was a pause. Then James said, "Herbert, you'reinsensitive, you know how close I was to Edgar —you should have broken the news to meslowly. When I asked about Edgar tonight, you should have said, 'Edgar's on the roof , but Ihave called the fire department to get him down.' And tomorrow when I called, you could havesaid the firemen were having trouble getting Edgar down, but you were hopeful they wouldsucceed. Then when I called the third time, you could have told me that the fire-men have donetheir best, but unfortunately Edgar had fallen off the roof and was at the veterinarian's. Thenwhen I called the last time, you could have said that although everything possible had beendone for Edgar, he had died. That's the way a sensitive man would have told me about Edgar.And, oh, before I forget," James added, "how is mother?"
"Oh," Herbert said, pausing for a moment, "She' s on the roof."
学习啦在线学习网 郝伯特和詹姆斯兄弟二人一起生活，家中有一老母并养了一只猫叫埃德格。詹姆斯特别喜欢这只猫。有一次他要外出几天，临行前不厌其烦地嘱咐郝伯特照顾好这只宠物。出门后的头一天晚上，他打来电话询问：“埃德格好吗?”
学习啦在线学习网 “它死了，”郝伯格回答。一阵沉默之后，詹姆斯说：“郝伯特，你真没心没肺，你知道我多么喜欢埃德格——你应该把这个消息慢慢地告诉我。当我问起埃德格今晚怎样时，你应该说，‘埃德格爬上了屋顶，我已给消防队打了电话，让他们把它救下来。’我明天又给你打电话时，你应该说消防队营救埃德格遇到了困难，但你相信他们会成功。在我第三天给你打电话时，你可以说消防队员已尽了最大努力，但很不幸，埃德格从屋顶上掉了下来，被送到兽医那里。在我最后一次给你打电话询问，你可以说尽管对埃德格做了一切所能做的努力，它还是死了。这是一个富有感情的人告诉我埃德格的消息时所用的方式。哦，趁我没忘记还有件事顺便问一下，”詹姆斯补充道，“母亲好吗?”
“哦……”一阵沉默后郝伯特答道，“她上了屋顶。”