小学生英语笑话小短文大全
小学生英语笑话小短文大全
作为人类所特有的天赋，幽默被认为是日常会话中一种最宝贵的语言形式。长期以来，幽默因其在人际交往中的神奇效果，已经成为研究者们普遍关心的话题。小编精心收集了小学生英语笑话小短文，供大家欣赏学习!
小学生英语笑话小短文：Good News and Bad News 好消息和坏消息
学习啦在线学习网 The soldiers had been marching and fighting, they were dirty, hot and tired. One day, the general announced: "My men, I have some good news and some bad news for you. Which one would you like first?"
学习啦在线学习网 "The good news!" they all shouted.
"OK," said the General. "The good news is that you will each be receiving a complete change of clothing."
学习啦在线学习网 "Hurrah!" chorused the soldiers.
"And now for the bad news. Jack, you will change with John. John, you will change with Tom. Tom, you will change with Robert. Robert ....
士兵们连续的行军，作战，他们又累又热又脏。一天，将军宣布：“士兵们，我有一些好消息和坏消息要告诉你们。你们愿意先听哪个呢?”
“好消息!”他们嚷道。
“好吧，”将军说，“好消息就是你们每个人都可以彻底的换一身衣服。”
“乌拉!”士兵们高兴地大叫起来。
“现在呢，该是坏消息了。杰克，你将和约翰换衣服，约翰，你和汤姆换，汤姆，你和罗伯特换，罗伯特……”
小学生英语笑话小短文：I've been trying to do that for years
A man went to the police office wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before.
"You will get your chance in court." said the Desk Sergeant.
"No, no, no." said the man. "I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I've been trying to do that for years."
一个人来到警察局想和昨天潜入他家偷盗的贼聊聊，警察告诉他说，“你在法庭上会有这个机会的。”
学习啦在线学习网 “不，不，不”，这个人说，“我就是想知道他是如何做到潜入我家并且还能不惊醒我的老婆，我已经努力好多年了都没能做到这点。”
小学生英语笑话小短文：Repetition Has Many Applications 学以致用
In a sales company, the boss said to one of his employees,
"The main thing to remember is repetition, repetition, repetition! That's the key! If you have a product to sell, keep harping on it in every way possible. Repeat it; cram it down people's throats. Even make yourself sickening and repulsive if you have to, but don't everforget to repeat, repeat, repeat. It's the only way to get results and sell our products!"
So, the employee said, "Yes, sir!"
学习啦在线学习网 Then the boss said, "Now, what was it you came to see me about?"
学习啦在线学习网 And the employee replied, "Well, sir, it's about a raise, a raise, a raise!"
销售公司的老板对一位员工训话：
“重要的是要记得重复、重复、重复!‘不断重复’是重要关键!推销产品时，要用尽各种方法对客户不断反复地游说，对他们进行疲劳轰炸。情况需
学习啦在线学习网 要的话，即使让对方对你厌恶、反感也在所不惜。就是不要忘记‘重复再重复!’这是得到业绩、销售产品的不二法门!”
员工回答：“老板，了解了!”
学习啦在线学习网 老板又说：“好，现在说说看你们来找我有什么事?”
员工回答：“老板，我要加薪!加薪!加薪!”
小学生英语笑话小短文：Early Big Shopping 提早大抢购
An offender was brought to trial before a judge. The judge asked him, "What is the crime you have committed?"
学习啦在线学习网 The offender said, "I went shopping too early during the New Year."
学习啦在线学习网 The judge said, "This is not a crime! Is there a mistake, perhaps? So how early did you go shopping?"
学习啦在线学习网 He answered, "The shop was not yet open for business, and I was already inside."
学习啦在线学习网 有个犯人被带到法官面前审案，法官问他：“你犯了什么罪?”
犯人说：“因为我在新年时，太早去采购了。”
学习啦在线学习网 法官说：“这不是罪呀!可能是弄错吧?那你多早去采购呢?”
学习啦在线学习网 他说：“商店还没开门，我就已经进去了。”
小学生英语笑话小短文：The Value of a Good Question 律师的咨询费
A man called a lawyer and asked, “How much would you charge me to answer three questions?” The lawyer said, “0 dollars!”
And the man said, “That’s a lot of money, isn’t it?”
学习啦在线学习网 The lawyer said, “I guess so. What’s your third question?”
学习啦在线学习网 有个人打电话给律师，问道：“你回答三个问题的收费是多少钱?」律师回答说：「四百美元。”
这个人说：“这要不少钱，不是吗?”
学习啦在线学习网 律师回答说：“我想是吧!你的第三个问题是什么?”
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