经典的爆笑英文小笑话大全
经典的爆笑英文小笑话大全
学习啦在线学习网 民间笑话故事像神话小说等民间文学一样，是广大劳动人民在长期的生产劳动和与自然界作斗争的过程中，以口头形式创作和传承的文学体裁。学习啦小编分享经典的爆笑英文小笑话，希望可以帮助大家!
经典的爆笑英文小笑话：To Profit from a Misfortune 因祸得福
A man was a butterfingers(手脚笨拙的人). He had been suffering from unemployment for months.
学习啦在线学习网 At last he found a job in a chinaware house. He had worked only a few days when he dropped a large vase.
The manager summoned him to the office and told him that money would be deductedfrom his wages every week until the vase was paid for. He asked: "How much did it cost?" "Five hundred dollars." said the manager. "Oh, that's wonderful," he said happily, "I'm so happy that I have got a steady job at last."
有一个人很粗心，老是打烂东西。他已失业好几个月了。
最后他在一个瓷器店找到了一个工作。可是才干了几天，英语小故事他就打烂了一个很大的花瓶。
学习啦在线学习网 经理把他到办公室去，告诉他每个星期都要扣他的工钱，直到赔偿够了为止。他就问：“那个花瓶值多少钱?”经理说：“值500美元。”他很高兴地说：“啊!太妙了，我非常高兴，终于有个稳定的工作啦。”
经典的爆笑英文小笑话：How did I do? 我干得怎么样?
学习啦在线学习网 A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came in telling them to disperse some people who were loitering(闲荡). The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner. The rookie rolled down his window and said, "Let's get off the corner, people." A few glances, but no one moved, so he barked again, "Let's get off that corner...NOW!" Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled stares in his direction. Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, "Well, how did I do?" "Pretty good," chuckled the veteran policemen, "especially since this is a bus stop!"
一名新警察与老警察开着警车第一次出去巡逻。 他们得到命令去疏散一群闲逛的人，于是他们开车去了那条街，看到路口站着一群人。新警察摇下窗户：“大家注意了，快离开这里。”人们看了他几眼，没理他。他喊起来：“离开这里，马上离开!”大家都不知道怎么回事，但是在他的威胁下还是离开了。新警察对他第一次执行公务的结果很满意，对老警察说：“我干得怎么样?”“你做得很好，”老警察笑着说，“尤其是在公共汽车站。”
经典的爆笑英文小笑话：It's Too Late 太晚了
学习啦在线学习网 A medical student was called on to state how much of a certain drug he would give to a patient. He promptly replied: "Five grains."
A minute later the student asked the professor, "May I correct my answer?" The professor looked at his watch and said: "It's too late. Your patient died thirty seconds ago."
一个医科学生被要求说明他给病人服的那种药的用量。他立即回答道：“五粒。”
一分钟后，这个学生问教授：“我可以改正我的回答吗?英语小故事”教授看看手表，说：“太晚啦，你的病人已在30秒钟以前死了。”
经典的爆笑英文小笑话：Fit for Tat 以牙还牙
The great Chinese diplomat Dr. Wu Ting Fang was in the United States a number of years ago. One day he met an American woman at a reception. She did not know him.
So she asked sweetly, "What 'nese' are you--Japanese, Javanese, or Chinese?"
Dr. Wu replied, "I am Chinese." And then he asked the woman:"What 'kee' are you-monkey, donkey, or Yankee"
中国的大外交家伍廷芳博士多年前在美国的时候，曾在一个宴会上遇到一个美国女人。
这个女人不认识他，就很亲热地问道：“你是什么‘佬’(指nese)呀，日本佬、爪哇佬，还是中国佬?”
伍博士回答说：“我是中国人。”然后他就问那个女人：“你是什么肌(指Kee)呀，猴肌，驴肌，还是羊肌?”
经典的爆笑英文小笑话：A Vacation Cruise 假日巡航游
One stupid guy reads an ad about a vacation cruise that costs only $ 100. After he signs up and pays, the travel agent hits him with a bat, knocks him unconscious and throws him out the back door into the river. Soon another guy comes in, pays his fee and gets the same treatment.
学习啦在线学习网 Fifteen minutes later, as the two are floating down the river together, the first man says, "I wonder if they're serving any food on this cruise."
"I don' t know, the second guy replied. "They didn't last year."
学习啦在线学习网 一愚笨之人读到一则假日巡航游只须花100元的广告。在他签了字付了款后，旅游经纪人用棒猛击了他一下，把他打昏了过去，并把他从后门扔进了河里。不久又来了一个人，付了钱并得到了相同的待遇。
学习啦在线学习网 十五分钟后，这两个人一起向河的下游漂去。第一个人说：“不知道他们这次巡航游是否提供食物。”
“不知道，”第二个人说道，“去年是没有的。”
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