七年级英语笑话小短文阅读
七年级英语笑话小短文阅读
笑话一般指短小、滑稽的故事,是一种民间口头创作形式,在民间文化中以口口相传的形式传播。学习啦小编分享七年级英语笑话小短文,希望可以帮助大家!
七年级英语笑话小短文:Tarzan
Tarzan gets into a huge fight with a lion in the jungles of Africa. The lion is defeated, but not before it rips off Tarzan's arm, eye, and dick. Of course, Tarzan's jungle friends help him out by giving him the parts he needs -- the eye of an eagle, the arm of a gorilla, and an elephant trunk for a dick. A while later, Cheeta the Chimp asks Tarzan how his new parts are working out for him.
学习啦在线学习网 "Tarzan like. With new eye, can see far. With new arm, Tarzan strong. But no like new wee-wee."
"Why's that?"
"It keep taking weeds and shoving in Tarzan's ass."
七年级英语笑话小短文:Only In New York
A New York City cop was on his horse waiting to cross the street when a little girl on her new shiny bike stops beside him.
学习啦在线学习网 "Nice bike," the cop says, "Did Santa bring it to you?" "Yep," the little girl says, "he sure did!"
The cop looks the bike over and hands the little girl a ticket for a safety violation.
"Next year tell Santa to put a reflector light on the back of the bike." the cop explains.
The young girl looks up at the cop and says, "Nice horse you got there officer, did Santa bring it to you?"
学习啦在线学习网 "Yes, he did," chuckled the cop.
"You need to tell Santa that the ass belongs underneath the tail, and not on top of the horse".
七年级英语笑话小短文: No More Chicken...
A little boy and girl at school were having lunch in the shelter shed.
学习啦在线学习网 "Tommy," she said, "I'm not eating any more chicken sandwiches."
"Why?" he asked.
学习啦在线学习网 "'Cause I'm starting to grow feathers down here," she said, pointing to the bottom of her tummy.
"I don't believe you," he said. "You'll have to show me."
Behind the shed they went, where the inspection took place.
"You're right," he said. "I've been eating a lot of chicken also. Perhaps I'm getting feathers too."
学习啦在线学习网 "Well, I'd better have a look," she said.
学习啦在线学习网 After a lengthy examination, she looked up and said, "Oh, I think it's too late for you. You've got the neck and giblets too."
七年级英语笑话小短文:Coffee
A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning.
学习啦在线学习网 The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee."
学习啦在线学习网 The husband said, " You are in charge of the cooking around here and you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee."
学习啦在线学习网 Wife replies, "No you should do it, and besides it is in the Bible that the man should do the coffee."
学习啦在线学习网 Husband replies, " I can't believe that, show me."
学习啦在线学习网 So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament and shows him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says .
"HEBREWS"
七年级英语笑话小短文:Grave Dancing
A drill sergeant had just chewed out one of his cadets, and as he was walking away, he turned to the cadet and said, "I guess when I die you'll come and dance on my grave."
The cadet replied, "Not me, Sarge. I promised myself that when I got out of the Army I'd never stand in another line."
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