关于中长篇英语笑话欣赏
学习啦在线学习网关于中长篇英语笑话欣赏
笑话可以帮助我们减轻人生的各种压力，消除工作上带来的紧张和焦虑，战胜烦恼，振奋精神。本文是关于中长篇英语笑话，希望对大家有帮助!
关于中长篇英语笑话：Trust
A defense attorney was cross-examining a police officer during a felony trial which went like this:
学习啦在线学习网 Q: Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene?
学习啦在线学习网 A: No sir, but I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offenderrunning several blocks away.
Q: Officer, who provided this description?
学习啦在线学习网 A: The officer who responded to the scene.
Q: A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?
学习啦在线学习网 A: Yes sir, with my life.
Q: WITH YOUR LIFE? Let me ask you this then officer--do you have a locker room in the police station--a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?
学习啦在线学习网 A: Yes sir, we do.
Q: And do you have a locker in that room?
学习啦在线学习网 A: Yes sir, I do.
学习啦在线学习网 Q: And do you have a lock on your locker?
A: Yes sir.
Q: Now why is it, officer, IF YOU TRUST YOUR FELLOW OFFICERS WITH YOUR LIFE, that you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with those officers?
A: You see sir, we share the building with a court complex, and sometimes defense attorneys have been known to walk through that room.
关于中长篇英语笑话：Still a virgin
学习啦在线学习网 A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.
学习啦在线学习网 On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."
学习啦在线学习网 "What?" said the puzzled groom.
学习啦在线学习网 "How can that be if you've been married ten times?"
"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.
学习啦在线学习网 Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he'd look into it and get back to me.
学习啦在线学习网 Husband #3 was from field services: he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.
学习啦在线学习网 Husband #4 was in telemarketing: even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.
Husband #5 was an engineer: he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.
Husband #6 was from finance and administration: he thought he knew how, but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.
学习啦在线学习网 Husband #7 was in marketing: although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.
Husband #8 was a psychologist: all he ever did was talk about it.
学习啦在线学习网 Husband #9 was a gynecologist: all he did was look at it.
Husband #10 was a stamp collector: all he ever did was... God! I miss him! But now that I've married you, I'm really excited!"
学习啦在线学习网 "Good," said the new husband, "but, why?"
"You're a lawyer. This time I know I'm gonna get screwed!"
关于中长篇英语笑话：Shot duck
A big-city California lawyer went duck hunting in rural Texas.
He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence.
学习啦在线学习网 As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing.
学习啦在线学习网 The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and now I'm going toretrieve it."
The old farmer replied, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."
The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the U.S. and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own."
The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the Texas Three-Kick-Rule."
The lawyer asked, What is the Texas Three-Kick-Rule?."
学习啦在线学习网 The farmer replied, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth, until someone gives up."
学习啦在线学习网 The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.
The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and walked up to the city feller. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees.
His second kick nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The barrister was flat on thisbelly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to give up.
The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "OK, you old coot! now, it's my turn."
The old farmer smiled and said, "No I give up, you can have the duck.
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