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简单的英语笑话

时间: 韦彦867 分享

简单的英语笑话

  笑话一般比较短小,喜剧性很强,普遍存在于人们的日常生活中。笑话的娱乐作用可以减轻人的心理压力,促进身体健康。学习啦小编分享简单的英语笑话,希望可以帮助大家!

  简单的英语笑话:Talking clock

  While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends, a college student led the way into theden.

  一个学生带他朋友们参观他的新公寓,甚是得意。

学习啦在线学习网   "What is the big brass gong and hammer for?" one of his friends asked.

  “那个大铜锣和锤子是干什么用的?”他的一个朋友问他。

  "That is the talking clock," the man replied. "How's it work?"

学习啦在线学习网   “那玩意儿厉害了,那是一个会说话的钟”,学生回答。

  "Watch," the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with thehammer.

  “这钟怎么工作的”,他的朋友问。“看着,别眨眼了”,那学生走上前一把操起铜锣和锤子,拼命地敲了一下,声音震耳欲聋。

  Suddenly, someone screamed from the other side of the wall, "Knock it off, you idiot! It's twoo'clock in the morning!"

学习啦在线学习网   突然,他们听到隔壁墙那边有人狂叫,“别敲了,你这白痴!现在是凌晨两点钟了!”

  简单的英语笑话:Secret For a Long Life

学习啦在线学习网   A woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch.

  一位女士走向坐在门廊的椅子上摇动的小老头。

学习啦在线学习网   "I couldn't help noticing how happy you look," she says.

  “我无意中发现,你是多么幸福,”那女士说。

学习啦在线学习网   "What's your secret for a long, happy life?"

学习啦在线学习网   “你幸福而长寿的秘密是什么?”

学习啦在线学习网   "I smoke three packs a day, drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods and never, everexercise."

  “我每天抽三包烟,每周喝一箱威士忌,吃高脂肪食品,而且从来不曾锻炼。”

  "Wow, that's amazing," says the woman.

  “哦,真神奇,”女士说。

  "How old are you?"

  “你高寿?”

  "Twenty-six."

学习啦在线学习网   “二十六。”

  简单的英语笑话:Two Lines In Heaven

  Everybody on earth dies and goes to heaven.God comes and says "I want the men to make twolines.One line for the men that dominated their women on earthand the other line for the menthat were whipped by their women.Also, I want all the women to go with St Peter."

  世上的每一个人都上了天堂 神说 :" 要男人分成两队 , 一是在世上控制女人的男人 ,另一是被女人鞭打的男人 .另外女子自成一队 , 跟着圣彼德去 ."

学习啦在线学习网   Said and done, and there are two lines. The line of the menthat were whipped was 100 mileslong,and the line of men that dominated women, there was only one man.

  队伍列好后 , 一是被女人鞭打的 ,有 100 英里长 , 一是在世上控制女人的 ,仅有一人 .

  God got mad and said. "You men should be ashamed of yourselves.I created you in my imageand you were all whipped by your mates.Look at the only one of my sons that stood up andmade me proud.Learn from him! Tell them, my son,how did you manage to be the only one onthat line?"The man said, "I don't know, my wife told me to stand here."

  神生气的说 :" 你们男人应该感到羞耻 ,我按照自己的形象创造了你们 ,而你们被女子鞭打 . 看看 , 我唯一的儿子 ,站着使我骄傲 . 你们应该向他学习 .告诉他们 , 儿子 ,你如何成为唯一站在这一队上的 ?"这男子回说 :" 我不知道 , 我太太叫我站在这的 !"

  
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