外国最新幽默笑话阅读
外国最新幽默笑话阅读
学习啦在线学习网 笑话是一种增强快乐的文化，常常以篇幅短小，故事情节简单，文笔巧妙的形式出现，给人以出乎意料，并且取得笑意的艺术效果的文化。在忙碌的生活，我们也需要偶尔的放松一下自己。下面学习啦小编为大家带来外国最新幽默笑话，希望大家喜欢!
外国最新幽默笑话：疼痛之极
A construction worker was rushed to the hospital after cutting himself badly. The doctor told the nurse to prepare a painkiller. "Don’t bother Doctor," said the man. "I' ve been through a lot worse."
学习啦在线学习网 一个伤痕累累的建筑工人冲进了一家医院，医生马上让护士去拿止痛药，“不必麻烦您了，医生。”那人说道，“比这更痛的伤我都经历过了。”
学习啦在线学习网 "More painful than this?" the doctor asked.
“比现在的伤还要痛吗?”医生问。
"I’11 tell you about the second most painful accident I ever had. I was hunting one day and had to take a shit so I dropped my pants and squatted. I tripped a bear trap and BOOM，the thing snapped shut on my balls."
“我先说说让我感到还不是最痛苦的那件事吧，一天我在打猎的时候突然想要大便，于是就脱掉裤子蹲在地上，不料被捕熊的夹子绊倒了，那东西夹住了我的皋丸。”
The doctor winced, "That’s awful. But tell me, what could be worse?"
医生听后颤抖了一下，说道“太可怕了，那告诉我什么又是最痛苦的事呢?”
"When I reached the end of the chain."
学习啦在线学习网 “当我摸到锁链尽端的时候。”
外国最新幽默笑话：与上帝为伍
A farmer purchases an old，run-down, abandoned farm with plans to turn it into a thriving enterprise. The fields are grown over with weeds，the farmhouse is falling apart，and the fences are collapsing all around.
学习啦在线学习网 一个农民买了一块破旧荒废的农场，他准备把这块农场变成兴旺的园林。然而目前这块地是杂草丛生，房屋破旧不堪，四周的篱笆也是东倒西歪。
学习啦在线学习网 During his first day of work，the town preacher stops by to bless the man’s work，saying, "May you and God work together to make this the farm of your dreams!”
学习啦在线学习网 在他第一天工作的时候，城里的一个传教士给他送去了祝福:“愿上帝与你一起实现你的梦想吧!”
A few months later, the preacher stops by again to call on the farmer. I}ok and behold，it’s like a completely different place-the farmhouse is completely rebuilt and in excellent condition，there are plenty of cattle and other livestock happily munching on feed in well-fenced pens，and the fields are filled with crops planted in neat rows.
几个月以后，那个传教士又一次来到农场，快看那，这里与上次相比简直是天壤之别。房屋重新修好了，条件也比以前好多了，成群的牛羊在欢快地吃着青草，地里的庄稼也整整齐齐的排列着。
学习啦在线学习网 "Amazing!” the preacher says. "Look what God and you have accomplished together!"
学习啦在线学习网 “太神奇了”，传教士惊呼道:“看那，上帝和你一起实现了你的梦想!”
"Yes, reverend,” says the farmer, "but remember what the farm was like when God was working it alone!"
“没错，教士，”那个农民说道:“可你也要记住当初这个农场只由上帝一人支配的时候是个什么样子!”
外国最新幽默笑话：教育阶段
学习啦在线学习网 The dean of Engineering had once walked into a class, and said "Good Morning.”
一天工程系的主任走进一个班，说道:“早上好。”
The whole class chorused" Good Morning”
全班齐声回复:“早上好。”
"Hi，you are freshmen aren’t you?" he asked.
“你们是大一的吧?”主任问道。
学习啦在线学习网 One student bolder than the others asked him how he knew.
一个胆子比较大的同学问主任是怎么知道的。
学习啦在线学习网 "Well，”he said. "When I say‘Good Morning' to a class，if they are freshmen they say Good Morning' too. If they are sophomores，they quietly fold their papers away，and look at me. A class of juniors will look at me over the top of their papers, and then get back to them. A class of seniors will ignore my greeting, and keep reading the papers. When I say `Good Morning' to a class of graduate students, they write it down.”
“嗯，”主任说，“如果是大一的新生，当我向他们问早上好的时候，他们也一定会说‘早上好’的。如果他们是大二的学生，他们会轻轻地合上课本，然后集体望着我。大三的学生则会从书本上抬起头看我一眼，然后马上又继续读书了。大四的学生则会对我视而不见，继续看书。至于研究生班的学生，我向他们问早上好，他们就会把这句话写在笔记上。”
外国最新幽默笑话：荒诞哲学
"God is Dead.” –Nietzsche
学习啦在线学习网 尼采说:“上帝死了。”
学习啦在线学习网 "Nietzsche is dead. " –God
上帝说:“尼采死了。”
"Therefore, Nietzsche is God. "-Plato
学习啦在线学习网 柏拉图说:“这样看来，尼采就是上帝。”